The Hairless Communiqué {2021}

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1. The Hairless Communiqué

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CONCERNING HENGA YOUNT

This document outlines the life of Henga Yount, a completely unique genetic and behavioural anomaly of the human species that has yet to be explained. It is even possible that placing him in the category of 'Homo sapiens' without qualification is not entirely accurate.

Yount was born in 1888 in Springfield, Ohio on a floating hospitality table during a seasonal flood. His parents were nondescript, first-generation immigrants from the Isle of Skye, both locally (but separately) employed as carpet peelers. Daily exposure to the unregulated chemicals used in the carpet trade during the 19th century has been put forward by some as a possible explanation for the strange nature of his birth, but this is very unlikely.

Aside from a slightly peculiar appearance, the physical presentation of infant Henga did not at first indicate anything particularly remarkable; in fact, it would not be until his death in 1969 that the full truth would be revealed after examination of genetic samples preserved from various stages of his life. Unknown to any at the time, this individual would turn out to be the only known example of 'Dissociated Non-zygotic Development' -- that is, an offspring that develops in the usual way inside a mother's womb, and yet somehow does not possess any genetic information originating from either of its parents. Several theories have been put forward as to how this might be possible, but all of them are equally implausible.

One theory posits that a fertilised egg from an outside source might somehow have been accidentally transferred into Mrs. Yount without her knowledge and, against all probability, somehow found a compatible environment in which to grow, regardless it's foreign origins. Another theory speculates that some specimen of the mother's internal microfauna might have adapted in such a way as to initiate the reproductive cycle without using any part of its host as source material: the idea being that all human cells have their origins in discrete, individual cells that developed over time into a co-operative unit, and so a version of this process could potentially still be ongoing with the cellular organisms that live inside of -- but are genetically distinct from -- every human being. A similar theory suggests that his mother had a latent chimeric twin which manifested a secondary, undetected womb within her own womb, and it was actually inside this hidden organ that the infant Henga was grown. All of these theories are absurd. However, this last theory, as full of rational holes as it might be, has its basis in one tantalising reality: Henga himself was in fact a chimeric twin -- meaning that he possessed two distinct genotypes (the second most likely from a twin that he had fully absorbed in the early stages of his mother's pregnancy) and neither of these genotypes had any relation to either of his parents.

As a child, Henga was determinedly uncommunicative. Had he lived in the present day, he might have been misdiagnosed as having some form of autism, but this was not the case. From an early age he developed a fundamental distrust of the very nature of human culture and communication. He also recognised that the capacity for humans to behave reasonably quickly dissipated as individuals came together in groups -- the larger the group, the greater the suppression of rational facilities -- and so he took any opportunity to avoid social gatherings. His parents were poor and uneducated, so it was not difficult for young Henga to evade school and most of society's other mandated forms of child socialisation. Instead, he took to visiting libraries at the optimal hours of low attendance and educated himself on the subjects in which he was interested. Even as a largely non-speaking youngster, his intellectual gifts would have been undeniable to anyone, had anyone been paying any attention.

Yount wrote and self-published his first book, 'Without Reflection', at the age of 15. In this treatise he levels a remorseless critique at all human institutions, and at the very concept of society in general, encouraging the individual instead to remain ever firmly in the present, relying only on first-hand, wholly verifiable information, and eschewing all traditions and beliefs that can not be supported by present-day fact. Better to remain ignorant on a topic, he suggested, than allow unsubstantiated claims accumulate into a vast, crumbling sandcastle that will inevitably collapse and bury the self in conflict and confusion. The acceptance of prescribed social history, and even personal history, as a source of reliable information was something he regarded as a dangerous mistake; similarly, to lend any significance to matters of personal taste was equally misguided and dangerous.

The book did not endear him to local authorities, but he was saved from any severe consequences by the fact that, since he never allowed himself to be in groups any larger than three people, he could never be accused of instigating any kind of public insurrection. It also helped that none of the judges or police commissioners that might have caused him trouble had any hope of properly understanding the implications of what he was writing about.

It was at this age that Yount began to develop his own inventions, his goal always being to pursue the simplest and most straightforward designs possible. He believed that any device which did not immediately display the full nature of its functionality to its user was a trap: if one can't build a thing oneself, and therefore can't fix a thing oneself, then a dangerous, self-sabotaging dependency is being precipitated by its use. Yount's inventions rarely involved more than three or four elements. He rode around town on a simplified, mostly wooden bicycle of his own design; and if it was lacking the potential to travel as fast as other, more complicated bicycles, it was still well worth the inconvenience in order to keep full control over his own affairs. He also developed a device for long-distance communication that consisted only of a Fittonia plant in a glass container, a hand-woven lattice of copper wire, and a sliver of unrefined quartz. Since he never pursued any patents for his ideas or attempted to gain any recognition for them, all of them have been lost.

In his late teens, Yount began to manifest one of the more peculiar byproducts of his unique biology: an ability to apprehend and influence many of his body's autonomic, and even cellular, functions. This ability had clearly been developing since his early childhood, yet it was only at this point in time that he chose to use it outwardly. In keeping with his attitudes about pursuing simplicity, he began to simplify his personal appearance, making his anatomy as nondescript as possible, yet stopping short of anything so reduced that it might attract unwanted attention. As was discovered later from preserved biological artefacts, he was also simplifying his cellular processes as much as was structurally feasible without interfering with necessary function (see figs. 4-6).

By his twenties, Yount had self-published three more books: 'The Misguided Ape', 'The Unencumbered Diet' and 'Endless Potential: the Stick'. A scattered interest in his ideas was steadily growing, but never to the degree that it could develop into any kind of cult scenario -- which was, of course, entirely in keeping with his intentions: for him, the important thing was that seeds were being planted which others could act upon according to their own capabilities. In all his subsequent writings, however, Yount made the deliberate choice to purge any cultural or historical influences from the language he used; this naturally induced him to have to invent entirely new forms of expression, which made the content of his later texts incomprehensible to anyone except himself.

Having fully made the transition away from pre-established forms of human communication, at the age of 27 Yount immersed himself in what would turn out to be a life-long preoccupation: the close study and analysis of the social behaviour of other animal groups. Having long decided that human social interaction was hopelessly flawed in nature, he hoped to find useful insights from other, non-human societal models. This began with an extended co-habitation with a family of raccoons in an unincorporated rural district in northeastern Ohio, but, over the following 50+ years, grew to include a wide variety of forms of life in places all across the globe. Here are a selection of Yount sightings recorded by several different observers:

(1915) Travelling with herds of caribou across Sami territory in northern Finland and Norway.

(1921) Camping alongside a nest of sweat bees in central Belize.

(1928) Swimming with a shoal of chub mackerel in the Sumatra Trench (using a submersible breathing apparatus of his own design).

(1933) Sleeping and fishing as part of a group of Gentoo penguins in the Falkland Islands.

(1938) Living amongst a marmot population in an Alpine national park in Switzerland.

(1946) Following a pod of Beluga Whales off the coast of Maniitsoq in Greenland (on a canticle-like circular raft of his own construction).

Following this last sighting, Yount disappeared from view for nearly two decades, leading many to suspect that he had drowned in the course of his attempts to study the whales. It wasn't until the mid-1960s that he was finally spotted again, foraging with a herd of wild boars in southern Kyrgyzstan. He was almost unrecognisable by this time, having decided to shed nearly all of his body hair and to simplify his appearance to an extent that almost didn't seem human anymore. However, a first-hand encounter by a pair of Kyrgyz horseman was able to verify that this person was in fact Henga Yount. He seems to have kept within this general region for the remainder of his life, living alongside different animal clades around western China, Mongolia, Kazakhstan, and sometimes as far north as Siberia. In 1969 his body was found in a thatched hut in Tajikistan, nearly featureless and essentially crystalline in its substance. A final piece of writing, which has come to be known as the 'Hairless Communiqué' was found nearby, neatly inscribed on a crude sheet of paper he had fashioned for himself out of ferule grass. It's contents were written in the Kyrgyz language, but still followed Yount's idiosyncratic grammatical rules, which made it extremely difficult to translate. What follows is an AI-assisted computer-generated translation, which is almost certainly entirely wrong (Yount certainly wouldn't have trusted it).

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THE HAIRLESS COMMUNIQUÉ

"Anyone who wants to tread on a song will be able to pass it, and you will be able to sing a dry song. In the context of the Song, the color of the capsicum melts from the color of the grass to the color of the grass.

The financier of knowledge is the slave of eating, I am the slave of reviving songs, I am the slave of those who want to spin, I am the slave of finding other things: I am the one who sings, I am the one who sings, I am the one who sings, I am the one who sings, I am the one who sings. I've been the barite reduction-card dealer for a long time, trying to figure out what to do with myself. It's a great way to show off your skills, and anyone who found the best way, died. Would you like a horse to die? Is innocence going to arrange the songs? We've got a horse for me.

Who would want to bury a dead body? How do you do all this?

The manna stopped the flow of blood, the flow of blood, the flow of blood, the flow of blood, the flow of blood, the flow of blood, the flow of blood, the flow of blood. The dynasties that go from the tombs of my co-workers. I know I'm going to die. My co-workers are dead. The diet is based on the diet of the elephant, the bulb of the night, the bulb of the night. Some people will know from below, and some will know how to do it. How do you do all this and get rid of clutter you don't need?

What’s so significant about a goat’s head? The century is the loudest thing in the house, who built the seed: "Ha-ha enters from the ha-hat." It is a country where culture is questioned.

The most terrifying songs will be nominated for the public, the songs will be broadcast on the hit radio station, and the popular song will be nominated. What’s so significant about a goat’s head? The words of no-one in particular, the words of the Minister of Education and Science, the song that will make the oceans grow?

This year, I'm going to clean up after two years of gold mining. Let's take a look at some of the two most common types of urticaria: urticaria, urticaria, and urticaria.

What is the beauty in the songs of the eagles? He sows: sows, and irons. Sing, rap and dance to these catchy beats. The song will be played by anyone who wants to play it, and you will be able to sing a dry song. I'm going to spin it, I'm going to spin it, I'm going to spin it, I'm going to spin it, I'm going to spin it, I'm going to spin it, I'm going to spin it.

The song asks the door how to recite the question that is not answered by anyone. Singing and music are connected with the great olohput. The two bristles do not rise or fall. We didn't even bother to look at the spot, and it will be revived in the near future. I'm going to take a scene from here. For years my dog ​​-- his beard, his nostrils, his eyebrows -- built an adyas sudurgu that he would kill. It's the kind of music that makes you cringe.

I'll kiss you good-bye, I'll kiss you good-bye. There are so many types, it's hard to say. I will prepare a special hole for those who have lost their lives. I will sing to the whole nation, I will sing the epitome of love, and the song is said to be the epitome of love. I went to the uranium hole to steal the sun, the moon, the stars, the stars, the stars, the stars, the stars, the stars, the stars, the stars, the stars, the stars, the stars, the stars, the stars, the stars, the stars, the stars, the stars, the stars.

What’s so significant about a goat’s head? Let me tell you: it was a scary place. I would like to thank someone for calling me my best friend. I heard the sound of the mountains on the 25th of July. The door is open to the public, and the door is open to the public. The dieter says that "chooon" is a well-known medicine.

What’s so significant about a goat’s head?

800s, stellar, an ordinary, daily number. The bull's-eye, the y'all's y'all, the y'all's y'all, the y'all y'all, the y'all y'all, the y'all y'all, the y'all y'all. How do you do all this?

The owner of the restaurant, said that the pressure was on from time to time. It has a hollow capsicum capsicum, which is the main ingredient in this soup. I'm in a trance, I'm in a trance, I'm in a trance, I'm in a trance. Cisternerin, followed by the capsicum of the boppuruostar of the tower, nowhere. I will sell my meat for a reason, and I will sell my meat for a price. Bye-bye to this: I'm from the saturated Republic.

Death is a critique of what I see and what I do not see. It's hard to imagine a song after a song. I've been singing a lot since I was a kid. Make sure you keep track of the miles you have; and if and when they expire. According to the caption, a high-ranking official said that other snakes were bitten by snakes. The caption reads as follows:

"My name is Khar. I did not do it because of my birth. A museum dedicated to my birth and upbringing will be seen by many, but it will not be remembered. What’s so significant about a goat’s head?”

The competition is so fierce that it's almost like a magic wand is in the process of being waited for and waited for. Does he pray that the shadows will be satiated? The issue's end has the recaptured Doomsday in the control of the KGB. Fill in the blanks. There are so many types it's hard to say. There are so many types it's hard to say. The black squirrel will fall from the squirrel's nest, and the squirrels will go to the squirrel's nest. The squirrel's radio station, which is located in the hole, will broadcast live, and the audience will be able to listen to it. It's extremely effective in counteracting the ill effects of diabetes. A prayer of congratulations from the mundane epithet?

I am very proud to be able to hold my congratulations on my birthday. Let's face it: most brochures go straight into the bin.

Uru: the shortest of them all? He will also be able to share his knowledge with the radio. Someday we will all grow up and sing the name of the song.

Please tell: what's the story of them big puppys? There are so many types it's hard to say. There are so many types it's hard to say. In fact, it is the authors who are responsible for protecting the people from the tyranny of a peaceful republic.

Please tell: what's the story of them big puppys?

I don't count to one, I'm improvised. What is the meaning of knowledge, and what is the meaning of death?
It is difficult. "